Someone wrote me after Sunday’s sermon where Moses prayed for the children of Israel who wanted to stone him (Numbers 14), “How do I pray for my enemies? Someone has been very cruel to a family member, and I’m not sure how to pray for them.”

This was my answer.  Hopefully it might help more than one person.

“Father in heaven, we’re hurting today.  ‘John’ has said and done some things that are so hateful it’s hard to believe they are anything but a deliberate intent to make us feel exactly what we’re feeling – deeply wounded.  For someone to want to injure that badly, there must be in his heart a lot of pain.  Someone has hurt John, and the only way he knows to relate to others is to hurt back or hurt first.  I pray that somehow you would release John from that pain.  Free him from the slavery of anger and resentment.  And forgive him, because he doesn’t know what he is doing.  As you work in John, work in me.  Teach me to rely on you, to trust in you, to wait for you to fight my battles for me.  There will be times when I need to draw boundaries or protect myself or my family, but my instinct is usually to do so much sooner than I should and in ways that only make things worse.  Free me from the need to take an eye for an eye, and release me from the desire to hurt him back the way he’s hurt me.  May John see in me the compassion and patience of Jesus.  Use me as a tool in your hands in his life and the lives of others.  And Father, forgive me for my failures to love you and love others the way I have been loved.  I pray all this through Jesus your Son, who knows more than any of us what it’s like to suffer unjust cruelty.  Amen.”

I liked what a pastor-friend said to me, “I don’t have any enemies - just confused friends.”  May we all have his spirit.