There is a way forward.

Psalm 51

July 11, 2010

Voices

Uriah: I am a soldier.  My loyalty is to the others who fight beside me.  We never know who will survive another day’s battles, but having brothers on either side of me who will make their bodies my shield if needed means fewer casualties and greater success.  We all do this for David, our King.  A man’s man, a soldier’s king – I will live for him, I will fight for him, and I will die, if necessary, for him.  When he brought me home to report on the battle, he wanted me to go home and enjoy the warmth of my home and arms of my beautiful wife, Bathsheba.  But I would never be able to enjoy carnal pleasures while my brothers are risking their lives for the king we all love.

Bathsheba: My husband never knew why he died.  I think about him every day.  He died with such honor and courage and loyalty – not only to King David but to me.  It was we – the king and I – who betrayed him.  I was so lonely.  I’m wired for touch, wired for passion.  I knew what I was doing when I bathed in view of the king’s palace.  But I never dreamed it would lead to Uriah’s death.  I guess I never thought about what it would lead to.  I wasn’t thinking.  I just knew what my heart told me.

Nathan:  I don’t fault Bathsheba.  She may have been a willing participant, may even have enticed the king intentionally.  But he was a man with a house full of wives, a memory full of God’s promises, and a heart full of God’s laws.  He knew better.  He knew better than to stay home while his men went to battle, knew better than to let lust consume him, knew better than to steal another man’s wife, knew better than to kill her husband, knew better than to think that a year of denial would make it all disappear.  Most of all, David knew better than to imagine that the God who chose Saul and then rejected him for disobedience and withdrew his Spirit would look the other way when David sinned.

Uriah’s Mother:  I don’t know whether to fault Bathsheba or not.  I just know my son is dead.  My son, the king’s loyal soldier, the one who never knew why he died.  David and Bathsheba – they can just move on with their lives.  Even though the son born from their infidelity is dead, they can have other children.  I can’t have another son to replace the one I lost.  My grief is inconsolable.  I will never be able to let go of my pain.

Mythtakes

Today’s sermon is for those who feel like Humpty Dumpty.  Their lives have been shattered into jagged pieces. The wisest and noblest cannot put them together again.

I have served as a pastor for too long to approach this subject as if it were merely theoretical.  Brokenness is as rare as oil on the shores of Louisiana.  I am not referring only to those who right now are frantically scrambling around the floor picking up sharp fragments, but also to those whose struggle is in the past.  I speak to those who have sinned and those who have been sinned against. 

I include all who ask hard questions and deal with unresolved pain.  I know God forgives me, but how I can I forgive myself?    Will life ever be the same?  I can forgive, but I will not forget.  How can I undo what I did?  Why is there no “reset” button that can take me back and let me choose the other fork in the road?

The word for today is a word of hope.  There is a way forward.

We find a model for that way forward in one of the most profound passages in all the Bible.  Martin Luther said no other Psalm was prayed more often in church.  Thomas Chalmers called Psalm 51 “the most deeply affecting of all the Psalms.”

What David writes is brilliant both from a spiritual and literary perspective.  Precisely because his own brokenness included both guilt and grief, and because he accepted full responsibility for immediate and long term consequences, this Psalm may be David’s greatest legacy.

What David does by example is to address some mistakes and dispel some myths (I call them “mythtakes”) about the road to wholeness.  When people are most broken, they tend to fall easily prey to the lies of the devil about how to get back on track.

Mythtake #1: “It’s not that bad”

This mythtake generally enters the picture early in the process.  Whether it’s financial pain, addictive behavior, a dysfunctional relationship, a loss, or a grievous sin, our first reaction is often denial.

Think about David’s timeline.  Based on the background of this Psalm in 2 Samuel 11-12, it was about a year between David’s adultery and Nathan’s confrontation, because the baby conceived in the night of passion was born before the prophet nailed the king.

I am sure David at first had some guilty thoughts about his lust, his sexual exploitation, and his murder.  But time passed, and those guilty feelings dissipated.  Nothing bad happened.  David thought, “It’s not that bad.”

Sometimes we’re like that at first.  I spent too much money.  I let my mind wander where it had no business.  I looked the other way when someone needed me or there was an injustice.  No lightning struck.  I got away with one.  “It’s not that bad.”

David shows us in Psalm 51 how the way forward begins with denying denial.  It begins with choosing to face reality – in his case, the consequences of what he had done.

What grabbed my attention as I read this Psalm was how David names what he has lost and what he fears he may not regain.

He’s lost his fragrance.  “Cleanse me with hyssop (a plant often associated with cleansing rituals in Judaism) and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow” (7).  He knows what it’s like to have battlefield stink on you – sweat, blood, grime – and have people avoid you.  He knows what it’s like to soak in a tub with soap and put on fresh clothes and perfuming spices to strut around his palace.  For a year now, David has been walking around feeling like he stinks no matter how often he bathes.  He misses being clean.

He’s lost the Spirit.  “Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me” (11).  David knew that the Spirit if the LORD had come upon his predecessor Saul (1 Samuel 10:10) and departed after Saul’s disobedience (1 Samuel 16:14).  He was terrified the same thing would happen to him – permanently.

He’s lost his joy.  “Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me” (12).  Colors are duller for him now.   Bathsheba’s not as alluring as she was.  Worship is no longer invigorating.  He doesn’t dance like he used to.

He’s lost his influence.  “Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you” (13).  David knew that his heart for God expressed in worship, risk, and sacrifice mentored the whole kingdom spiritually.  Now he can’t teach others or guide them to grace because he’s a hypocrite. 

As long as we hold on to the myth that “it’s not that bad,” we are doomed to the pit of brokenness.  An alcoholic has to hit bottom.  An adulterer has to be exposed.  A family facing terminal illness has to admit to mortality. 

Mythtake #2: Faster is better

A first reading of Psalm 51 is often puzzling because of verses 16 and 19.

“You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings” (16).

“Then there will be righteous sacrifices, whole burnt offerings to delight you; then bulls will be offered on your altar” (19).

This is enough of a contradiction that some have felt verses 18-19 must have been written hundreds of years later by editors of the psalms who did not want to downplay the importance of the sacrificial system when the temple was being restored.  That is possible, I suppose.

But I think David is marking a contrast between the quick fix of an offering and “righteous sacrifices.”

People (particularly those of my gender) want to make everything right with an “I’m sorry” and then move on.  Let me say a few words – from the heart, of course – and do something to make it up to you and then let’s act as if nothing happened.  It doesn’t work that way in human relationships and it doesn’t work that way with God. 

David certainly learned that sin has consequences even when it’s forgiven.  Uriah’s family never recovered what they lost (2 Samuel 12:9).  The sword divided David’s family (2 Samuel 12:10) and one of his own sons humiliated him publicly (2 Samuel 12:12). The child born of this unholy night of passion died (2 Samuel 12:14,18).

Life never returned to what it was.  A “new normal” was eventually established for David.  He kept his throne and his dynasty.  Life went on.  But the transition was not quick and it was not easy.

Here’s a general rule of thumb.  Even factoring in grace, life takes at least as long to restore as it did to break.  It takes hard work.  It takes help.  It takes, above all, patience.  Perhaps the most common mythtake about brokenness is that you can undo what’s been done in a rush.

So what makes the difference?  For David, it’s in verse 17.  “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit.  A broken and contrite (crushed) heart, O God, you will not despise.”

Nancy Leigh DeMosss has written a list of contrasts between “proud people” and “broken people.”  I have attached the entire list to the end of this sermon, but here is one example –

 

Proud people are concerned about the consequences of their sin. They are disturbed over the problems caused by their sin- for example, the financial bondage created by their over-spending, or the problems in their marriage that have resulted from selfishness and immoral choices.

 

Broken people are grieved over the cause, the root of their sin. They are more concerned about how their sin has grieved and dishonored God than about the problems that it has created in their lives.

 

There’s no limit to what God can do in us once we’ve admitted how deep is our brokenness.  When we are broken the “sacrifices” of v. 16 become the “righteous sacrifices” of v. 18.  God is pleased.  But humility is shown only with time, and only with a willingness to accept the consequences of our sin.

Mythtake #3: God is through with me

Whether my brokenness is my own doing or something that has been thrust upon me, a common myth is that God is through with me.  He’s never through with you.

David’s psalms model for us how “life becomes worship.”  In this case, worship includes confession, and this is how the Psalm begins. Look at the words David uses for the wrongs he’s done.

“Transgressions” (1, 3) implies a defection, a rebellion. It’s used of those who were formerly loyal and have become traitors.

“Iniquity” (2) means perversion or depravity.  It’s a crime.  We might even say a felony as opposed to a misdemeanor.

“Evil” (4) – bad, hurtful, unkind, vicious.

“Sin” (2, 3, 4, 5) – is to miss the way, to fall short of the goal, to be on the wrong path.

David multiplies these words not only for poetic emphasis but to show that he understands what he has done.  Verse 4 has puzzled some readers of his psalm.  When he says “against you, you only, have I sinned,” doesn’t that diminish his sin against Bathsheba and Uriah?

David’s intent is not to trivialize the human aspect of sin, but to elevate its seriousness.  David has ultimately broken faith with his God, who deserved loyalty and obedience most of all.  One version captures David’s meaning when it says, “I have sinned against you, especially you” (GOD’S WORD translation).

So David wants to express that he gets it.  Sin has become a barrier.

But here’s what gripped me about this opening section to the Psalm.  In verse 1, David says, “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.”

The words “mercy,” “unfailing love,” and “great compassion” all express what David knows he needs from God.  No pretense, no excuses, no plea bargaining – just a sinner naked before God asking to be clothed with righteousness.

Of the three expressions, the middle one is perhaps most powerful.  “Unfailing love” is the Hebrew word chesed, which can mean kindness, mercy, or grace – and is often translated by different words because its meaning is so broad.  But its deeper meaning is that it’s the word used to describe the unbreakable covenant between God and those who are his.  David begins his confession by reaffirming his place in the family.

Perhaps the most damaging of all mythtakess during brokenness is that a gulf has opened so wide between God and me that it cannot be crossed.  Sometimes we blame the gulf on ourselves and sometimes on God (depending on what caused it) but in a sense that’s irrelevant.  What matters is that we begin to believe God is no longer invested in us.  He doesn’t know or doesn’t care or has tossed us on his trash heap.

David chooses to believe otherwise right at the beginning of his Psalm.  I’m part of your covenant family, O God, and I’m reclaiming my place.  Not because I deserve it, but because I’m yours.  You are not through with me.

Broken pieces

Linda and I watched a romantic comedy the other night on DVD.  “When In Rome” tells the story of a woman named Beth who goes to Italy to attend her sister’s impromptu wedding.  She falls for the best man, although the story takes a few interesting twists and turns.

But her original stumble into love happens at her sister’s wedding.  The only part of the comedy that made me laugh out loud was when Beth takes responsibility for the tradition of breaking a vase at the reception.  She holds up a large ceramic vase and attempts to shatter it, because the number of pieces will indicate the years of happiness the couple will enjoy.

Apparently, the couple is doomed to less than a year because the vase won’t shatter.  Not at first, anyway – not until Nick gets a hold of it.

What I like about that scene, however, is the connection between brokenness and hope.  The truth is that the more broken we are, the more potential we have for becoming trophies of grace.

Samuel Chadwick said, “It is a wonder what God can do with a broken heart, if he gets all the pieces.”

From Brokenness:  The Heart God Revives  by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

 

Attitudes Toward others

1. Proud people focus on the failures of others and can readily point out those faults.

Broken people are more conscious of their own spiritual need than of any one else’s.

1. Proud people, have a critical, fault-finding spirit. They look at everyone else’s faults with a microscope but view their own with a telescope.

Broken people are compassionate- they have the kind of love that overlooks a multitude of sins; they can forgive much because they know how much they have been forgiven.

1. Proud people are especially prone to criticize those in positions of authority- their pastor, their boss, their husband, their parents- and they talk to others about the faults they see.

Broken people reverence, encourage, and lift up those that God has placed in positions of authority and they talk to God in intercession, rather than gossiping about the faults they see in others.

1. Proud people are self-righteous; they think highly of themselves and look down on others.

Broken people think the best of others; they esteem others as better than themselves.

1. Proud people have an independent, self-sufficient spirit.

Broken people have a dependent spirit; they recognize their need for God and for others.

 

Attitudes about Rights

1. Proud people have to prove they are right- they have to get the last word.

Broken people are willing to yield the right to be right.

1. Proud people claim rights and have a demanding spirit.

Broken people yield their rights and have a meek spirit.

1. Proud people are self-protective of their time, their rights, and their reputation.

Broken people are self-denying and self-sacrificing.

 

Attitude about Service and Ministry

1. Proud people desire to be served- they want life to revolve around them and their own needs.

Broken people are motivated to serve others and to be sure others needs are met before their own.

1. Proud people desire to be known as a success.

Broken people are motivated to be faithful and to make others successful.

1. Proud people have a feeling- conscious or sub-conscious- that “this ministry (or this organization) is privileged to have me and my gifts”. They focus on what they can do for God.

Broken people have a heart attitude that says, “I don’t deserve to have any part of this ministry”, they know that they have nothing to offer God except the life of Jesus flowing through their broken lives.

 

Attitudes about Recognition

1. Proud people crave self-advancements.

Broken people desire to promote others.

1. Proud people have a drive to be recognized and appreciated for their efforts.

Broken people have a sense of their own unworthiness; they are thrilled that God would use them at all.

1. Proud people get wounded when others get promoted and they are overlooked.

Broken people are eager for others to get the credit, and they rejoice when others are lifted up.

1. Proud people are elated by praise and deflated by criticism.

Broken people know that any praise of their accomplishments belongs to the Lord and the criticism can help them grow into spiritual maturity.

 

Attitudes about Themselves

1. Proud people feel confident in how much they know.

Broken people are humbled by how very much they have to learn.

1. Proud people are self-conscious; they worry about what others think of them.

Broken people are not preoccupied with what others think of them.

1. Proud people are concerned about appearing respectable; they are driven to protect their image and reputation.
2. Proud people can’t bear to fail or to think they are less than perfect. This can drive them to extremes- workaholic tendencies, perfectionism, the tendency to drive others or to place unrealistic expectations on themselves or others.

Broken people can recognize and live within God-given limitations.

 

Attitudes about Relationships

1. Proud people keep others at arms length.

Broken people are willing to take the risks of getting close to others and loving intimately.

1. Proud people are quick to blame others.

Broken people accept personal responsibility and can acknowledge where they were wrong in a situation.

1. Proud people wait for others to come and ask forgiveness when there is a misunderstanding or a breach in relationship.

Broken people take the initiative to be reconciled, no matter how wrong the other party may have been.

1. Proud people are unapproachable or defensive when corrected.

Broken people receive correction with a humble, broken spirit.

1. Proud people find it difficult to discuss their spiritual needs with others.

Broken people are willing to be open and transparent with others as God directs.

1. Proud people try to control the people and the circumstances around them- they are prone to manipulate.

Broken people trust in God- they rest in Him and are able to wait for Him to act on their behalf.

1. Proud people become bitter and resentful when they are wronged;  they have emotional temper tantrums; they hold others hostage and are easily offended; they carry grudges and keep a record of other’s wrongs.

Broken people give thanks in all things; they are quick to forgive those who wrong them.

 

ATTITUDES ABOUT SIN

1. Proud people want to be sure that no one finds out when they have sinned; their instinct is to cover up.

Broken people aren’t overly concerned with who knows or who finds out about their sin- they are willing to be exposed because they have nothing to lose.

1. Proud people have a hard time saying, “I was wrong, will you please forgive me?”

Broken are quick to admit their failure and to seek forgiveness when necessary.

1. Proud people tend to deal with generalities when confessing their sin to God (“Dear Lord, please forgive me for all my sins…”) or expressing spiritual needs to others (“I need to be a better Christian…”).

Broken people are able to acknowledge specifics when confessing their sin: “Lord, I agree with You that I love myself more than I love my mate; I confess that I am addicted to television; I’m a glutton; I have a critical spirit; I am an angry mother…”

1. Proud people are concerned about the consequences of their sin. They are disturbed over the problems caused by their sin- for example, the financial bondage created by their over-spending, or the problems in their marriage that have resulted from selfishness and immoral choices.

Broken people are grieved over the cause, the root of their sin. They are more concerned about how their sin has grieved and dishonored God than about the problems that it has created in their lives.

1. Proud people are remorseful over their sin- sorry that they got caught or found out.

Broken people are truly repentant over their sin, and the evidence of their repentance is that they forsake their sin.

 

ATTITUDES ABOUT THEIR WALK WITH GOD

1. Proud people are blind to the condition of their hearts.

Broken people walk in the light and acknowledge the truth about their lives.

1. Proud people compare themselves with others and feel worthy of respect.

Broken people compare themselves with the holiness of God and feel a desperate need for His mercy.

1. Proud people don’t think they need to repent of anything.

Broken people realize they need to maintain a continual attitude of repentance.

1. Proud people don’t think they need revival, but they are sure everyone else does. (In fact, right about now, they are making a mental list of the people they think need to read this book!).

Broken people continually sense their need for God and for a fresh filling of the Holy Spirit.